The True Meaning of Hashing

When I was laying the trail today, a lady said to me

“What is that white powder stuff you’ve laid beneath the tree?”

“Well”…… I said “It’s only flour, for a hashing trail tonight.”

She looked at me most quizzically, then, before she could take flight,

I explained to her about hashing, and what the signs all mean,

she asked a lot of questions, and sounded really keen.

“The whole concept of hashing is camaraderie and fun,

It’s NOT a race of who comes first, or run the longest run!

It’s NOT about how many miles they’ve done - one, three, five or eight

But, how many times they got a kiss through the kissing gate!

There’s more to hashing than the run, or counting up the miles

It’s all about the social side, and counting up the smiles.”

I said to her “There is a skill - in how to lay a trail,

everyone should start together, and finish without fail…….

within a few minutes of each other, no matter of their age,

ability, speed or fitness - a good trail should engage.

Lots of checks keeps folks together, this I must implore

on every possible junction draw a circle on the floor!

Arrows are a No No!! when they could easy put a check.”

(One blob and on is all you need, no need to break your neck!)

“It stops the Longs from running on and getting out of sight

It pulls them back to check on friends, to see if they’re alright!

Then, whilst the longs are checking out - the correct trail or a faux

someone stays upon the check, to kick out which way to go.

Shorts then have chance to catch up, keeping the pack as one

time to have a chat and laugh, making hashing so much fun!!

Lots of Long/short splits give them chance to change their mind,

so, if they take a route too far - they don’t get left behind.

Fish hooks, back checks and Ha ha’s, keep them running back to you

and gives the Longs the extra miles that they all want to do!

Calling “Onon” is essential, as loudly as they dare -

the ones behind then know the way, in the absence of the hare!

A re-group or a sweet stop gets the pack back as one again,

sometimes it’s a nice long break (or a short one in the rain.)”

“Drinking and eating afterwards is just as an important part

And getting everyone back on time is quite a skilful art.

The shorts don’t want to sit there, for ages on their own

with no one else to talk to, and start playing on their phone!

Or even worse they go on home and get ready for their bed,

when they could be sharing troubles or memories instead.

By laying lots of extra checks, and cutting down the longs

means everyone stays for down downs and enjoys the fun and songs.

And, if you’ve run with friends all eve, and not run all alone

You can award a proper down down, a good story you can hone!”

I tried my best to emphasise, the importance of keeping everyone together

And how the fun and camaraderie will keep us friends forever.

“ Your running club sounds such fun.” she said - But I shouted from the pub

“We’re a drinking club with a running problem, NOT a running club!!!!”

Soapy